


Bon Bon

by WaltzQueen



Series: Good times with Hellfire [13]
Category: Johnny the Homicidal Maniac, Squee (Comics)
Genre: Anniversary, M/M, Pets, well deserved pedo maiming
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-28
Updated: 2015-08-04
Packaged: 2018-04-01 16:01:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,460
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4026085
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WaltzQueen/pseuds/WaltzQueen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>lucky-in-love thirteenth wedding aniversarry</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> aka the lives and time of bon bon the rabbit. Kind of the inspiration for Annual, kind of not.

The thirteenth anniversary gift used to be ivory, but the endangered status of elephants made it a bit unethical. Of course that meant fuck all to the Antichrist. Pepito was more than willing to make an endangered species extinct for the sole purpose of providing his precious husband with a brand new piano, maybe an infernal knife for self defense (merely as a formality as whomever attempted to hurt him would be incinerated almost immediately by the magic Pepito layered on him over the years). However, Todd might not feel great about it, even if he didn't go out and kill the elephants. He suspected Todd would be even more upset if he transformed a worthless human being into an elephant like creature and then killed that. Todd was so sensitive, and generous, even towards those far below him. 

 

In response Pepito decided to widen the category to include any type of animal. The leather anniversary had already passed and what was the point of spooky doom powers and holding ultimate destruction over every being on earth if he couldn't exercise some originality? Counting out the endangered species, as Todd would object on principle, the creatures Todd didn't like, and the fact that he might not recognize worthless humans as the base animals they were, Pepito wasn't sure what would be a worthy gift. Wandering aimlessly, Pepito ended up in Hell. 

 

People in fancy clothes rushed past him, powdering their noses and looking up at the eye in the sky anxiously. Pepito ambled along, taking in the myriad faces until he came across a familiar one. Ah, yes, it was that pedophile that had tried to kidnap his husband as a child. Pepito hadn't gotten to meet, and thus dismember, him while the man was alive, but that face stuck out in Todd's memories, memories that Pepito had access to. Ever since finding him Pepito had taken a special joy in tormenting the disgusting bastard. It wouldn't help Pepito select an anniversary gift to torment the portly soul, but it would brighten his day, so...

 

Pepito summoned a puddle of mud and goats blood into the street just as another stupidly expensive car zoomed by,coating the man in the slop. Pepito grinned wickedly as ravens and crows descended from the empty skies to rip him apart. Damned souls made noises of anger and disapproval as he attempted to use others as a shield to no avail. Flailing, he tripped over the uneven sidewalk and landed face down in the road, where he began rolling around. Right on time the three fifteen bus came and ran him over. The pedophile clung to his miserable excuse for existence as he gurgled blood.The bus was followed by a horrific bull creature, which also trampled him and almost passed him by before turning back around to stomp on him until he was a lump and then jump up and down until that lump was a smear. As the blood flew every-which way Pepito's eyes followed a particularly far reaching gush of the stuff which splattered all over a pet store window. 

 

Hell did have a way of changing around him to please him, and this wasn't Hell's most subtle work, but he shrugged and let himself levitate over to the shop and through the door. Straight through the door. Todd might consider this cheating but Pepito ran Hell, he could be as incorporeal as he wanted( as long as Todd wasn't around to be upset about it). 

 

Pepito's half lidded eyes slid across the store and he let his booted feet settle against the ground. Bland white linoleum floors and beige walls were littered with signs declaring everything on sale in luridly neon lettering. He passed a row of empty cages on his way to the front, one of which began shaking as whatever sat invisibly inside it shivered as it felt doom pass it by. 

 

There were puppies in the front as there always are in every pet store. Of course the pet shops in Hell carried different breeds of dogs than Earth did; tiny Greek Cerberus, chubby Hell Hounds, lithe Mayan Xolotl and vengeful inugami sat in small cages. While not typical earth fare, they already had Woofles as a family dog and Pepito had no reason to replace her. That was doubly true for how fond of her Todd had grown. After the initial meaty, unimaginable terror simmered down into a chilli of creeping fear it had been completely natural for Todd to grow used to her the same way his beloved had grown to accept him. 

 

An inugami, tired of cursing the other puppies to an eternity of suffering, began whining and yapping. Soon every puppy in the front joined in the disastrous racket. It wasn't a surprise when a rolled up newspaper went sailing just to the left of his head to slam into the stack of cages hard enough to knock some over.

 

"Shut up, you stupid mutts!" the previously ignored cashier yelled, furious at being distracted from her fifth consecutive hour of touching up her makeup. The dogs all silenced at her shrill shriek.

 

Pepito turned his head around on his shoulders, in a one-eighty, to have a look at and through her. A typical damned soul, still concerned with appearances over everything else. She had obviously decided to work for a pet shop, thinking that pet stores were the place you worked if you wanted to be seen as down to earth and totally approachable but still too good for others. The first instance of actual work had put her off the idea and made her more surly, but she had stayed because this was the happening section of town to be in. But as always, Hell marches onwards and the store was no longer in the best part of town; it was only second best, hence the sale. She was Liquidating stock before she ran off to find a cooler job in this endless maze of thwarted hopes and suffering. 

 

She began fixing her eye shadow for the forty seventh time in the last half hour as Pepito turned his head the rest of the way around. Nothing special there and she would obviously not be a good pet for Todd at all. Todd preferred soft, small things, things as crushable and delicate as his delicious heart. Pepito's indifferent expression changed almost imperceptibly, the eternal glint of raging madness shifting shape, lighting up with not fury, but inspiration. Pepito suddenly knew exactly what to gift his beloved to bring a smile to his face. In the mean time, Pepito knew exactly how to bring a sinful grin to his own face.

 

In the end Pepito left the woman charred and maimed. The hole where the pet shop previously stood was little more than a smoking crater, a suspicious puddle of cursed meat, and twisted wire. A very pleased antichrist noted how chaotic it was to see the blaze spreading to other buildings as the damned screamed in panic. It was a nice footnote to his epiphany.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Present

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks Reraimu for the help  
> ETA: *muttered curses* There, typos fixed

Pepito lay cradling his husband in his spindly arms as the dawn broke over the day of their thirteenth anniversary like a bone on a cement brick; much more quietly than expected but still with a notable snap. While bone snaps were a great way to start a day, this snap, the sound of Pepito drawing on the infernal powers of hell to transport something, was special in its own way. The summoned pitch black sphere floated serenely just above to the side of the bed. Todd would love his anniversary presents (Pepito had decided that the additional ivory knife would be useful, even if only for sharpening pencils or slicing pig meat and wasn't above spoiling his husband) just as surely as the earth spun, hell blazed, and the gates of heaven were tinfoil. 

The hours lengthened as Pepito's eyes bored into the fleshy side of Todd's sleeping face. Pepito felt almost ready to burst and spew his excitement on the ground like sour milk. Times like this he felt like Todd might never wake up. He resolved, for the fifty seventh time, to ask Todd how he feels about not needing to sleep anymore. Even as he does so he knows he'll forget to ask again, caught up in Todd waking up. But for all of that, the walking cataclysm that was called Diablo wouldn't allow the bastion of goodness and kindness that was also called Diablo, as of thirteen years ago, to be woken by anything other than his own body deciding to do so. So Pepito stared at the man in his arms for the ninth consecutive hour, murmuring terrible, monstrous things until Todd blearily opened his eyes and started the day.

"Hey, Pepito," Todd whispered. He shifted slightly to face the gangly being clutching him firmly to his unmoving chest.

"Buenas Dias, mi Corazon." the Antichrist responded, just as softly and besottedly. He leaned over and pressed his chapped lips against Todd's forehead. Kissing a wakeful Todd was far more satisfying than staring at his sleeping form. "Happy anniversary, mi Querido."

"I think you're really going to like what I got you this year," Todd beamed delightedly. together they stretched and sat up. Todd kicked the thick blanket, seventh anniversary wool, off of himself, shuffled the pillow, twelfth anniversary silk, off to the side and resettled on the bed, fifth anniversary wood, to face his caring, wonderful, unrepentantly evil, demonic husband of thirteen terrifying, terrific years.

"I like what you get me every year." Pepito replied. Pepito hadn't lied, he really did like all the gifts Todd had gotten him over the years. There hadn't been a single gift he didn't like in some fashion. Even if he hadn't liked a single gift the fact that it was Todd bestowing it upon him would have made it good enough for him.Grinning devilishly, he reached over to pull Todd into a kiss that would have literally killed anyone else. He hissed out endearments and sincere promises, working his way from lips to throat and back.

Pepito pulled back eventually. Todd didn't strictly need to breathe anymore, but better safe than sorry. Todd clung to him and nuzzled his head against his pulse-less neck a moment. Pepito watched the human he loved so much lean over the side of the bed and reach around under it. As he drew out a small box Pepito felt himself overcome with childish excitement. 

"What did you get me, Todd?" Pepito aimed for calm and collected but Todd could hear the droning of the cosmos behind his words grow higher in pitch perfectly well so it really was a lost cause. Pepito's nails scraped against each other with sinister knifeblade sounds as he fidgeted. Todd no sooner handed the box over than Pepito was literally ripping into it. His razor sharp nails shredded the wrapping paper and cardboard alike near instantly. 

"Oh, mi amor," Pepito crooned, running his hands over the revealed golden rings. "I love it." Pepito's taloned hands plucked one from its box. The tiny skull shaped ring reflected the red and green glow of his eyes in the shadowed room. His beloved had chosen nicely. Pepito thought the gold looked nice against the skin of his hand. Pepito leered wickedly and met Todd's eye, linking their minds. He loudly thought it would look good on his hand as he dragged it all over Todd's supple flesh. It would glint nicely in the light of his eyes as the caressed all his tender places. He luridly imagined the clink they would make against the key around Todd's neck or the lock around his own as they enjoyed any number of naked activities. Pepito watched as Todd blushed and averted his eyes with embarrassment. The Antichrist chuckled, all that would have to come later, though. Todd hadn't yet received his gifts.

Pepito began to slide it on to his pallid finger when Todd gently took it from him and slid the ring onto Pepito's hand himself. He reverently repeated the process until all the rings were settled on the ashen digits.The skull was well at home amid correctly sculpted hearts and wheels and what upon closer inspection was an orobouros with finely crafted teeth. Todd's palms ran softly over and under Pepito's callused knuckles. They sat there for a long moment, holding each others' hands and wordlessly pouring their affection into the air in great sticky heaps.

"And now for you, my Beloved," the antichrist murmured gently. Pepito softly withdrew his ring bedecked left hand and reached over to the side of the bed where the previously summoned orb was still floating. He drew it over to himself, dug his fingernails in and popped it. It burst in a tiny halo of darkness and rose scented smoke. As it dissipated, Pepito reached into the lingering smoke and pulled out an ivory knife. Jade and emerald was engraved into the handle in what should have appeared to be oddly disturbing scribbles to the average human observer. He gifted it to Todd carefully as though it were a ritual he was deathly afraid to perform incorrectly. 

"Oh, Pepito, how thoughtful." Todd ran his eyes over the inscription, struck by the heartfelt meaning in what he could read on the handle. Todd leaned over to kiss his adoring husband when he felt something nudge his stomach. His eyes flicked down to see a bundle of ...something prodding him gently.

"It is a Hadesian rabbit." Pepito informed him, watching him carefully. Todd picked up the strange rabbit cautiously. It had the body shape of a regular earth rabbit and long floppy ears, however it had four eyes on its head arranged in a diamond shape with more trailing down its back. What had appeared to be fur was upon closer inspection was some type of grass like plant covering its whole body. Todd looked at the rabbit. The rabbit looked back at him. Todd blinked. The rabbit closed four eyes and opened them again, however only one of those was still an eye, the other three were now tiny mouths with very obvious, if overly sharp, bunny teeth peeking out.

"I love it Pepito!" Todd beamed delightedly. "I'm going to call it Bonbon." The newly named Bonbon was set gently on the bed as Todd turned to smooch his husband of thirteen years. When the two on the bed began getting up to more energetic activities Bonbon hopped off of the bed and out the bedroom door. It had to take stock of its new environment and besides, those two would probably be busy for quite a while anyway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The name for the breed of rabbit is Hadesian. Which is really just me being lazy and putting :-ian: on the end of Hades. The rabbits fur being grass is a reference to Asphodel Meadows, the place in Hades where the dead hang out if they're not great but also not huge jerks.


End file.
